"Inside Out Approach of Image Management"

My wife Pallavi and I had this incredible opportunity to meet Judith Rasband at her institute in Salt Lake City, Utah. It was extremely kind of Judith to give us an appointment on a short notice. For uninitiated in the subject of ‘Image Management’ Judith is the iconic Guru who redefined image management and gave it an identity as a profession. While Pallavi was like “Alice in the wonderland” as she was meeting the Guru of Image Management, I was simply blown away by passion and incredible depth of thinking by Judith as she explained us her work.

At a point of time she asked us a very simple question – ‘what are some of the major barriers in your surrounding when it comes to image management?’ That set me thinking and in my opinion finally everything boils down to your belief system which in turn is deep rooted in your culture / upbringing / the messaging that you have been continuously listening as you grow up.

So what are the cultural messages that I have seen around? I remember a common theme in middle class families of 70’s and 80’s -  whenever one spent more time on ‘looking better’ mostly one got the rap on the knuckles saying, ”You better focus on your studies! If you know your subjects well, it does not matter how you look.  What is going to save you in life is your education and not the looks!” While intention behind this could be noble, I always felt that there were some beliefs that were embedded in these kind of comments :

“If you know your subject well, the presentation layer just does not matter. People who do not know their stuff need to spend more time on the presentation stuff!”

Conversely, “If you are spending too much time on your looks and presentation layer, you may lack depth of  knowledge”

“Focusing on looks and presentation layer is phony – almost glossing over the real facts!”

While I am not an expert on image management, I have definitely seen a lot of super talented people suffering to achieve their full potential because they are stuck in some of the beliefs above.

Solution to this problem is reframing some of the beliefs or challenging these beliefs by showing contrast in the very culture that perpetuated these beliefs.

To the people who question the necessity of image management, I would like to draw their attention to the following situation. Especially in India, when you are meeting your prospective bride or a groom for the first time, why do you take care to dress up a notches up than your ‘normal self’ Is it not phony to do that – why not just let the hearts connect with each other?

I think if the cultural beliefs are coming in the way of making yourself presentable, it can be countered by another strong belief in the same culture and that belief is that of “Respect”.  When you meet someone special for your date, you do not ‘dress up’ because you are phony or would like to mislead the other person. You do so because that other person means something to you, it is also being respectful to the person who is special to you.

So, how about being respectful when you are meeting the world? How about putting your best foot forward so that you indicate your respect to the world instead of an arrogant “I need to be accepted the way I am because I am superior!” Once we anchor our thoughts around the belief of respect, making oneself presentable is just a few step away and if it has to work the process is always “inside out”!!