Remembering Appa....

Today Appa would have been 90.... actually I should say today he turns 90 as he lives on in our memory.

I first met Appa when I was 21.... little tentative about how would a grandfather react to grand-daughter’s ‘boyfriend’. What struck me about Aaji (grandmother) and Appa was that they were a peculiar pair of grandparents. Well, they looked like any normal, sweet and loving grandparents but were not actually the archetypical grandparents..... with the twinkle in the eyes they would discuss good novels, films – both English and Hindi and of course music.

Generally when you go to meet the older people, apart from affection, there is also a feeling at the back of your mind to lighten up their day.... in my case I used to visit Appa to lighten up my own day.

As the collage emerges, sweet memories come one after other...

Rarely have I seen such an amazing sense of humor with an exquisite timing..... once in a nationalised bank, an arrogant cashier asked ,”What do you want??” “ 1 Kg potatoes and 1 Kg Onions” pat came the reply. As the fellow was frothing with anger, Appa burst out laughing...... We wanted to run for cover when he asked the fruit vendor “imli kya bhaav diya (whats the price of tamarind?)” because the fellow had given him sour oranges on earlier occasion. Aaji would get extremely worried at these antics but he had a simple theory which made a lot of sense – he would generally calm her down saying “I am an old man and so frail that no-one would ‘dare’ to touch me, at best they would think I am senile which is quite alright!”

I always found it amusing when he used to go to drop my mother-in-law to the bus-stop and check out whether she has got into the bus properly. Aged around 50 and a distinguished educationist in her own right, Appa would treat her exactly like a school-kid. I stopped feeling funny as I waved to my daughter getting into her school bus years later.....

For me, talking to Appa was like watching an old Dev Anand movie like a CID. Apart from being a Dev Anand fan I love that genre of movies as they show a Mumbai of 60’s...... I just love watching the old Mumbai of that era. Appa would walk me down the era much before my birth.... like a grandfather taking a child for a walk. He was an engineer by profession and had a long stint with ACC.....was an outstanding expert in Engineering Design..... we would talk those times... working culture... social life. There was never “good old days compared to today”. While we were discussing job changes he once told me..”I also wanted to change my job once .. but then realised I was working for the best and biggest company of my sector.. where would I go?” – in a life with extremely insecure childhood and lot of struggle he always maintained a very clear-headed approach.

We were gifted to hear the stories from him – he would narrate the old English movies and we would just become kids all over again. One of his most favourite was “The Good Earth” – a movie in 30’s based on Pearl Buck’s novel by the same name. He would tell me about the story, acting, cinematography and virtually everything about the movie. “Lets watch it together if you get it” he would always say. Years passed by, but somehow, I never could lay my hands on that. Once during a long transit period between the flights at JFK, as I was passing time at Madison Square, I walked into a huge bookstore. On a kiosk, I just casually typed “The Good Earth” in the Films section .....and got it .... almost ran to the second floor to pick up the DVD. I hurriedly came back to the Airport to watch it on my laptop. As I started watching it...I realized Appa’s power of narration.....Sitting alone at a far-off place, mist in my eyes blurred the movie.... a thought gnawed my mind.....I knew Appa was on the final stage of his life....we were never going to watch it together....nothing in the world could bring me that moment......As the protagonist (character “lived” by Paul Muni) enters the local entertainment house.....I shut down the laptop..... It is over two years, I have still not watched “The Good Earth” .............may be one of Appa’s Birthdays, I’ll sit together with family and watch it..........