I do not remember much about my grandparents as they used to stay in other city and were quite old by the time they came to stay with us. Though one incident about my grandfather has stuck with me and I guess I will never be able to forget it as long a I live!
My grandfather had lost part of his memory due to an accident, so ,some times, he could not relate to his immediate surroundings. One day my elder sister went up to him to give him a 'pedha' - one of the most popular Indian sweets made from milk. My sister had cleared some important examination and was distributing 'pedha's as per tradition. He took it, muttered some blessings and kept the pedha in his hand. My mother smiled and told him that she would also give it to his son - my father! He said ok and he would eat it little later. My father came home from office after a few hours. Irrespective of my grandfather's condition, he would always know my father's arrival. He called my father and gave him the 'pedha' that he had kept in his hand for his son. The old man had kept the little sweet in his hand for a few hours just to give it to his son. It was such a touching moment that all of us were deeply moved! But as was the tradition, nothing much was said about it!
Many things rush to my mind whenever I think of that incident. Parental love is universal - whether it is expressed or not! My earlier generations carried an enormous pressure of never expressing their true feelings as it would be seen as sign of weakness or arrogance. Howsoever strongly you felt, you nevert talked back to your elders lest you should hurt them. My grandfather and my father never sat across each other and talked expressing their feelings! But the intensity of their relationship was no different than the one I share with my son! Today I feel blessed as we can express ourselves freely and enjoy the moments of life enriched with bouquet of feelings!
There were some merits of earlier ways of life - there was an uncompromising sense of responsibility and duty. So while we enjoy the freedom of expression that relieves us from burden of carrying unexpressed feelings, we also have responsibility to care. Freedom of expression does not mean freedom to hurt anyone or freedom to walk away from responsibilities just because we have a freedom to express! While we enjoy freedom of expression, let's carry with us the good old values of caring for others with a sense of duty! Extreme positions may tempt you to choose either this or that but pleasure of life is in striking balance!
My grandfather had lost part of his memory due to an accident, so ,some times, he could not relate to his immediate surroundings. One day my elder sister went up to him to give him a 'pedha' - one of the most popular Indian sweets made from milk. My sister had cleared some important examination and was distributing 'pedha's as per tradition. He took it, muttered some blessings and kept the pedha in his hand. My mother smiled and told him that she would also give it to his son - my father! He said ok and he would eat it little later. My father came home from office after a few hours. Irrespective of my grandfather's condition, he would always know my father's arrival. He called my father and gave him the 'pedha' that he had kept in his hand for his son. The old man had kept the little sweet in his hand for a few hours just to give it to his son. It was such a touching moment that all of us were deeply moved! But as was the tradition, nothing much was said about it!
Many things rush to my mind whenever I think of that incident. Parental love is universal - whether it is expressed or not! My earlier generations carried an enormous pressure of never expressing their true feelings as it would be seen as sign of weakness or arrogance. Howsoever strongly you felt, you nevert talked back to your elders lest you should hurt them. My grandfather and my father never sat across each other and talked expressing their feelings! But the intensity of their relationship was no different than the one I share with my son! Today I feel blessed as we can express ourselves freely and enjoy the moments of life enriched with bouquet of feelings!
There were some merits of earlier ways of life - there was an uncompromising sense of responsibility and duty. So while we enjoy the freedom of expression that relieves us from burden of carrying unexpressed feelings, we also have responsibility to care. Freedom of expression does not mean freedom to hurt anyone or freedom to walk away from responsibilities just because we have a freedom to express! While we enjoy freedom of expression, let's carry with us the good old values of caring for others with a sense of duty! Extreme positions may tempt you to choose either this or that but pleasure of life is in striking balance!
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