A walk to my birthplace - Day 25 (100 Km covered so far)

I hit the road after a couple of days and finally hit my 100 Km-mark. While walking today my mind went back to something that happened over dinner a few days back.

I was with some people over dinner and when the time came to order my drink, I ordered my usual orange juice. Person sitting next to me asked “So are you off the alcohol these days?” “No, actually I never had alcohol in my life.” “Really, great abstinence!” – I just smiled because to me this was not an issue to discuss at all.

But that comment set me thinking … Actually abstinence assumes a temptation that is avoided … in my case there was never any temptation. I come from a simple middle class family where drinking neither was a part of culture nor socially accepted.  Generally many friends tried a drink or two at 17 and had to do a lot of efforts to hide it from their parents. In my case, my parents had always trusted me right from the childhood.  I don’t remember them ever asking me an account of my time or money spent – ever! Hanging out with friends, I used to return home past midnight like any normal teen-ager but do not remember ever being asked about my whereabouts. Same was true for money .... there were times when I spent money and asked for replenishment pretty fast – no questions were asked. Also, in this relationship there was no room for a lie or a secret! If I had taken a drink, there was no option of keeping it secret and my mother would have been extremely hurt if I had touched alcohol! I guessed that must have settled the issue for me quite early in life!

Do I have any views on alcohol? NO – not at all - I think it’s a matter of personal choice and a lot depends on the rules of engagement in the family. I have seen many cases of parents bonding with their kids over a drink or two. I have seen in these relationships based on openness and trust.

As long as you have congruence with your value system and that of your dear ones,   a drink or two does not matter!

A walk to my birthplace - Day 23 (94 Km covered so far)

Today I came back home in the evening and felt little unwell. I was feeling little feverish and decided to take rest. This meant that I could not go for my walk today. Since “A walk to my birthplace” has started, I really look forward to my walks. Funny, how you get going behind something with a single-minded focus once you make a mission out of it.  I was little disappointed not to add any distance to my walk today but did not want to take risk as tomorrow is a working day!

So, very unlike myself, I settled into a beanbag in the leaving room and dozed off for some time. I got up when I felt someone touching my forehead. I saw Janhavi – my 16 year old daughter checking out anxiously if I had fever. “Are you ok?” she asked. “Of course, I am, just trying to take a bit of rest. Nothing serious”.  Obviously she did not believe me and kept hovering around. She got me some water and asked, “Should I make some tea for you?” “No, thank you. But I will have some food after some time”. “Ok” she said and sat next to me. When I was ready for my supper, Janhavi quickly got up and got me some rice. “You eat here”. Once I finished my food she quickly picked up the plate and went away. “Do you need anything?” “No, I am fine”.

By now I was feeling little funny about the whole situation. I was not that unwell. The way my daughter fussed around me was peculiar! How quickly kids grow up! I was not able to decide whether I prefer my tantrum-throwing, demanding little daughter or this caring young lady.  

I suddenly started feeling much better even without covering any more distance in Kilometers – In little moments like these you realize the distance your kid has traveled!

A walk to my birthplace Day 22 (94 Km covered so far)

What is the most common phenomenon at any tourist spot?  You always see tourists clicking photographs for capturing permanent memories of the place / occasion. One of the most cynical comments I ever heard was – ‘People click the pictures in frenzy and then do site-seeing when they browse their albums at home!’

Nothing wrong with that – the concept of photograph was perhaps invented to capture the memories. My mind drifted to one momentous occasion which is marked by lack of one photograph which should have been taken. In 1953, Edmund Hillary and Tenzing Norgay climbed the world’s tallest peak – Mount Everest. When they reached the top, they spent only 15 minutes at the top. They had limited time as they had to head back safely. They quickly assessed the situation, looked for any evidence whether the earlier expedition by George Mallory had reached the top. Tenzing left a chocolate at the top and Hillary left a cross he carried. And of course Edmund Hillary clicked the photos! He clicked the photos from the top to prove authenticity of their claim and also took photo of Tenzing Norgay unfurling the flags of Nepal, UK, UN and India! But there is no photograph of Edmund Hillary at the top! It is said that Tenzing was not familiar with a camera and hence there is no picture. Tenzing in one of the interviews years later said that he had offered to take a picture of Hillary but he refused – he did not want it.

I wonder what must have been the reason for Hillary to not have a photo? Perhaps he had decided to leave a memory different than a photograph. Sir Edmund Hillary spent significant part of his life to improve the lives of local ‘Sherpa’ community by opening multiple schools, hospitals and providing clean drinking water.  Apart from his legacy of philanthropy, he also left a legacy of adventure – exactly 50 years after his successful Mount Everest expedition, his son climbed Mount Everest along with Tenzing’s son!

Here was a man who had an indomitable spirit of adventure – he was the first (and perhaps only) man to have been on both poles of earth and Mount Everest; to drive a farm tractor to South Pole. In 1977, he also traveled in a jet boat starting from ocean towards the point nearest to the origin of Ganges.

Take a bow Sir Edmund Hillary – you will always remind us that there are better ways of preserving memories than a photograph! 

A walk to my birthplace Day 21 (89 Km covered so far)

Flipping through the channels, I just lingered on National Geographic HD channel. It was a program on wild animals. A female leopard fought with a big female baboon and finally killed it. As the leopard started pulling the carcass up the tree, I decided to change the channel to avoid any further gory details. Just when I was about to change the channel, my fingers froze! A tiny one-day old infant fell off from the belly of the baboon. I was in double mind – I wanted to change the channel but curiosity prevented it. As the tiny baboon infant fell off from the branch the leopard approached it. I held my breath. The leopard gently cuddled the infant baboon. Scared as it was the infant baboon started crawling across. The leopard suddenly saw a hyena lurking around. Instead of protecting its kill, the leopard first gently picked up the infant and put it on the tree. Then it came back to chase away the hyena. The infant baboon, scared and confused, kept crawling across and leopard did its best to keep it on the branch safely. Finally the infant baboon settled with the leopard and cuddled together, they both rested!

I literally had Goosebumps! As I switched off the TV I was extremely disturbed.  We call human beings an evolved species. Regularly one reads in the newspapers the hideous act of what is shamelessly called “Honor killings”. Just because the kids decide to be partners with someone who is not from the caste/creed the council of wise men (!!!!) decide to punish them with brutal murder.

If a predator like leopard makes its best efforts to save the infant of its prey, what gives us right to call ourselves a higher species? As long as hideous events like honor killing continue to happen around us we definitely don’t deserve the description!!!!!!!!

A walk to my birthplace - Day 20 (85 Km covered so far)

I heard this story just yesterday and loved it …. This is story of two monks – one old and another younger one. One day both the monks were walking through a forest. While walking through forest, they came across a flowing river. The river was not very deep but the current was quite strong. While they were searching for an appropriate spot to cross the river, they saw a very beautiful young girl standing on the river bank. She looked worried. As the monks approached her, she bowed to the older monk and said, “O wise one, I need to cross the river but I am scared of the current. I cannot walk through the river”. The old monk quietly held out his hand but she said, “I am so scared, I really cannot walk even holding your hand”. The old monk looked at her and without a word picked he up in his arms and walked across the river. Once they crossed the river, the old monk put her down and she walked away after thanking him.

Both monks crossed the forest. The young monk was deep in his thoughts. Monks had taken oath of celibacy and were not supposed to touch a woman. What old monk just did seem so inappropriate! He kept quiet for a long time but finally could not bear the burden of his thoughts.

He asked the old monk, “Why did you carry that girl across the river?” The old monk turned around and said in a calm voice, “Young man, I left her on the banks of the river long back, why are you still carrying her in your mind?”

It happens to us many a times. We are so bound by rules of the society that we forget the purpose behind those rules. Rules soon become rituals to be blindly followed! There are times when temporarily moving away from rules is necessary as long as it does not hurt anyone! Carrying guilt at those times is purely irrelevant and unnecessary!!!!

A walk to my Birthplace - Day 19 (78 Km covered so far)

In Maharabharata there is a story of Bheema – the mighty pandava and lord Hanuman –  revered as god of strength. Bheema was extremely proud of his strength and that pride had made him arrogant. One day when Bheema was going down the path, he saw an old monkey sitting on the road with its tail spread across. Bheema ordered the monkey to move the tail and the frail monkey said. “I am too old to move. Why don’t you move it?” Bheema, with all his strength could not move the tail even by an inch. Finally he bowed to the monkey and asked for forgiveness. That’s when lord Hanuman who was in the guise of an old monkey came into his own being.

I had heard this story quite a few times but it had not sunk in well…. It did - a few years back-  in a very peculiar way ……

In India long distance driving holidays are not as common as some of the other countries. I was 35 then and had planned a driving holiday all the way up to Nainitaal and Kausani (approximately 2000 Km from Pune where I stay). It was a long drive and we traveled as a big team comprising me, my wife, daughter, parents, in-laws and my brother-in law. Kausani was the farthest point in our trip and after thoroughly enjoying our stopovers at Corbett, Nainitaal, we finally arrived at Kausani. We stayed a small hotel facing the valley. After watching the sunset from the terrace, I strolled down to bonfire lit in hotel’s backyard. I came across an elderly gentleman who must be in his early sixties. We said hi to each other and he asked “where have you come from”. Feeling proud about my long distance driving I told him,” I have come from Pune and I have driven all the way with my family in Innova (MUV manufactured by Totoya)” Excellent” said the old man. Little disappointed that he showed no further curiosity I asked him about himself. “Well, I am 63 and retired. I have come from Bangalore.” “So, how did you come?” The old man quietly said, “I have a santro (small car  by Hundai) and I drove down from Bangalore”. I was speechless! Here was a man almost three decades older than me and had driven down almost 1000 km more than me in a small car and was pretty cool about it!

I blushed and felt extremely foolish about my own pride! I guess god has his own design to quietly put things in perspective. Thank you lord for everything!

A walk to my Birthplace - Day 18 (75 Km covered so far)

I think I have bragged enough about my driving skills multiple times. But, here is a story that is little different than my normal brag stories.

I was driving up the Zoji-La (La=pass) on the way to Leh. Zoji-La is a narrow strip of dirt road that winds up the mountain without any protection on the side of a deep valley. It is  high altitude drive where you drive at around 12000 ft above the sea level (The highest point on the road is Fotu-La which is approximately 14000 Ft).

This was the first time I was driving in such high altitude. I had my family with me and I drove my SUV extremely carefully. At one point I stopped by, to give side to the other vehicles. As I started again up the slope, my vehicle started sliding down. I pushed the paddle to no effect. It was pretty scary to slide back on that slope but finally the vehicle was stopped.

A young Kashmiri driver riding his rickety utility vehicle watched this whole episode. He came to me and said “Sir, drive it with gentle care – don’t press the paddle. Your vehicle will easily climb! If it does not-I will drive it myself. Don’t worry”. I prayed to the god and started again following his instruction – this time driving at ease and pushing the paddle gently – it worked!

At high altitude, there is less oxygen. If you push the paddle, you just flood the engine with not much oxygen available for combustion – you have to push the paddle carefully – just enough for vehicle to climb easily.

There is always less oxygen at the top! This applies to the corporate careers as well. As we climb up, the terrain changes. It is no longer only about pushing the paddle – but to also ensure that you have enough oxygen to go ahead!

As one goes up the corporate ladder, one has to ensure that you maintain your oxygen. This oxygen is your support system in terms of relationships – in and out of workplace, your friends and your hobbies. If you just keep pushing the paddle, you do not give time for the oxygen to act effectively and mind eventually gets flooded with stress. It is the same stress which has kept you on toes and got you to compete and reach certain height. But if it floods your mind – slide may start! Be careful – as the terrain changes – what got you here may not take you further!