Atal-ji, me and my complacency....

On the week-end I was just spending time at my parent’s place – this is the place where I grew up and spent most part of my life so far. I feel just great wandering around the place doing particularly nothing... In the living room showcase amongst other things I noticed a gold medal. While I kept gazing at it memories came flooding......

Must have been year 1980 or may be 1981...I remember I was in sixth standard. There was a State level elocution competition held at our school....it was a big occasion (or god knows Nostalgia is making it bigger...). I won the gold medal and the medal was presented to me by none other than Honourable Mr Atal Bihari Vajpeyee. Atal-ji had just stepped down as a Minister of External Affairs in Janata Government and had a huge fan following in the area where I grew up. Well...it was a big occasion and when we got my photograph with Atal-ji my mother was particularly ecstatic. As was the practice in those days she took me around the neighbourhood with the photograph and I basked in my glory happily..... As we went to one particular neighbour’s place, he held the photo and admiringly said, “Hmm... future prime minister” and I just blushed! Well, I knew I had won a big competition but this was little too much...... We came out of their house and as soon as the neighbours closed their door my mother whacked me, “You idiot.... they were talking about Atal-ji not you!!!” I remember that shocked expression on her face at the thought that I never ever thought that the other man in the photograph was little better qualified than me to become the Prime Minister of the Country.....!!!

I think this particular incident defines my overall approach to life which has not changed much over the years. Ill-effects of complacency are well-documented so let me put down something in defence of it especially when I feel I have not fared too badly (you are right this is one of the key symptoms!!) .....

Complacency helps you to think of yourself almost as a god’s gift to mankind and just as you may be oblivious to many critical things happening around you, you are also insulated from the scorn of the world!

Your ambitions almost always have a very romantic aura around them so while success does not affect you (you always deserved it right?...) even a failure is nicely engulfed into a romantic feeling that you get watching a well made tragedy film!

There is a fine line that divides complacency and arrogance..... in arrogance you think of others negatively....in complacency you are always so sure that others are fond of you that there is no question any negativity!

Complacency does not allow you to hurt anyone easily as that does not befit your overall self-image of a romantic hero!

You do not mind working hard simply because you generally are well aware of your importance to the world at large!

I do not know whether it was sheer luck or God’s own design(ya...I seriously think God has time to specifically design my destiny!) that landed me in the IT Industry at the beginning of my career and was so comfortable though out my stay there as I thrived amongst the Software Engineers – who pretty much like me have this feeling about themselves that they are God’s gift to mankind!

As I upload this post on my blog...I just wonder how much and how many folks are going to enjoy reading this!!!!!

The lost art of appreciating a Movie.........

The real fun of watching movies was always at my native place – Kolhapur. It was a complete return-on-investment stuff – The action off the screen almost matching the show on the screen. Kolhapur happens to be a prosperous (smallest city in India with Merc showroom of its own!!) art-loving city. I do not know how many cities in India have the film artists’ / directors’, classical music maestros’ statues without they turning politicians and all. I do not know how many cities have Raj Kapoor’s statues in public places – The city has always been a movie buff and quite evolved when it comes to Cinema – The golden era of Marathi Cinema (yes there was!) was from this place.

As most of the school holidays used to be spent there, Kolhapur has always been an integral part of my childhood. It is in those holidays that I really freaked out on the “movie experience” that was so different from routine Mumbai one..... But what made movie watching in Kolhapur so exciting was not the Kolhapur citizens – it was the people who poured in from country-side that made it special. Being the most happening place of that part of the world – folks from nearby countryside used to flock in – to entertain themselves....as well as entertain others albeit unintentionally....

The fun started right at the ticket window..... was not uncommon to have an argument at the window for “One full and one half ticket”!....its only when the fellows in the Queue intervened, the fellow would grumblingly take out the balance money from the folds of his turban.......

No-one wasted precious printing ink on stuff like printing seat numbers on tickets ...... so as the crowd waited for doorkeepers to open the door, scene resembled more like sprinters waiting for the whistle... By experience, you would know that there was no need to participate in the race..... the winners generally preferred front seats!!

The class act was “Big B” movies – always reverentially referred as “Bachchan” – the entry would be greeted with shrill whistles and a generous shower of coins on the screen.... the involvement in Bachchan was so complete that it was not unusual for a few to stand up and cheer the fights.... not to mention the tips that poured in for the fights... well after all its a city of wrestlers....... Loud expletives were thrown at villains - for those who do not know the place, strong expletives (what you call Gaalis) is not considered bad manners...its just part of ...well....normal language!

I still remember watching re-run of iconic Zanjeer in Kolhapur. As I took the seat, a fellow in front of me took out his pouch and while sharing the tobacco with the neighbour said something seriously, which I remember word-by-word to this day ...” this movie there is no tension – that b**##%d Praan (the famous villain) is with Bachchan, otherwise he can be a pain!” as they relaxed in their seats, I just stopped myself from asking – “But what about Ajit? (the villain of Zanjeer)”.

As I watch the movies in comfort of a multiplex or my living room sofa with much better “Technology” experience – I almost get a lump in my throat missing the real experience around – the source of which is a rare commodity now – innocence!


The most amazing movie experience was when Pallavi and I went to Kolhapur first time after our marriage – The big joint family decided to go for a movie – it was the smash-hit that time – Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge (DDLJ)........ As we were taking our seats two of my younger cousins (I think they were in 3rd or 4th standard) rushed and sat on either side of Pallavi.... they wanted see the movie with their brand new bhaabhi (elder brother’s wife)..... so I watched DDLJ sitting between my mother and my aunt! I am waiting for those buggers to grow up and marry.....so that I can take them to a movie in Kolhapur with their newly wed brides......!!!!

Of Diwali and Guns ....

Once the Dusshera is over, I almost have to kill time till its Diwali – one of my most favourite festivals with lots of great memories around it.

Even today I try and live Diwali almost the same way I used to enjoy in my childhood – well almost the same way I should rather say....

One of the greatest childhood fantasies was around the Diwali guns with the strips of crackers loaded on to it – well - this had to stop at a certain age more on account of social pressure than my own will to stop it!!

Every Diwali as I get into my “child zone”, I always kept missing this one piece - till one fine day a brainwave struck..... I think it was nearing Diwali time about five years back when Janhavi - my daughter – was in 2nd Standard. As Pallavi used to work on Saturday – it was a day always shared by father and daughter. Of course Pallavi had given us something to study as some stupid class Test was around. As soon as she left, we finished Janhavi’s study in about 15 minutes flat!! ... I always had a very democratic way of dealing with my daughter’s study when wife was not around – we flipped through some pages and both agreed she knew everything – as always I realized what a brilliant child I am blessed with....

“Janhavi, I have a plan for some fun”....I was scratching my head to entice my partner in crime....”Lets go and buy couple of toy guns and crackers – one for you and one for me”.....”But I don’t like guns much – lets go and buy something else”.....”Hmmm...well sweetheart.. we’ll build a story around it”.....”You mean like a movie??”...asked the veteran 7 year old movie buff...”Of course!!”....”Wow....amazing...sounds like a plan!!! Lets go”......

Just went out and bought a couple of really mean-looking ones....what an amazing act of indifference I had to put on at the shop, while purchasing those guns lest the shopkeeper should feel I am NUTS!..... Could hardly wait to come home.....As soon as we were back, I loaded both the guns with the cracker strips...”well ... lets start” .....taking position behind the staircase in the house – I fired the first volley almost delirious with joy!.........”WAIT!...you said we’ll do like a movie!!”, Janhavi yelled tightly covering her ears....”Yes...so I’ll be the dacoit”....I offered half graciously...half puzzled! “Not like this...where is the story?” “WHAT story??” I asked coming out of my hideout...”Well you sit here..I’ll make one”...”OK” I sat down on the sofa resigning to the situation.....Next 15 – 20 minutes she just moved tables and chairs to create a set as if competing with Nitin Desai! Sitting idle I just fired another round of gunshots in the air only to be snubbed and asked to be quiet for some time.....then came a script..........GOSH!..with clear instructions about where she will come from.. what will she say and when exactly is my turn to say my piece.....as I obediently took my position I fired another round of shots...”Can we do something about that?”....my director asked pointing towards the gun ....”WHAT?”....”That thing just makes a crazy noise!” she continued to my utter dismay ”Can we just take out those stupid cracker strips and play our movie?”...Resigned to my fate, I threw away the cracker strip from my gun and went through playing my part so energetically that even Bharat Bhushan (god bless his soul) would have looked dashing and dynamic!!!

With one brilliant idea nipped in the bud that time, I am waiting for my chance again now as Diwali approaches

Chinmay – my son – the younger of my children is growing now......well I am waiting again for a Diwali....now-a-days they make such fantastic pieces....I have already spotted couple of sleek Diwali guns.....really sleek you know..........

Innovation...Akshaya Patra... and .. Dr JJ Irani Live!

I was attending the 36th Annual conference of AIMA in Chennai last week. Second day morning session was interesting. This was a session on Innovation chaired by Dr JJ Irani with presentations from Akshaya Patra Foundation and NOKIA. Looked promising!
Dr Irani started the proceeding with a easy flowing introduction explaining how innovation was forced on many including TATA Steel post liberalization. In a mischievous tone he noted… before the economy opened up all had freedom to heap substandard products on customers including steel of course.
After narrating the evolution and relevance of innovation he introduced Sreedhar from Akshay Patra Foundation. Sreedhar – a career Sales professional turned philanthropist started narrating the vision called Akshay Patra – No child in India should give up education due to empty stomach!....Education alone can change financial status of a family even in a first generation of education… He narrated true story of a boy studying in one of the Government schools scoring at about 45% marks on an average…. Problem very simple …. One full meal was a luxury…never had one! As he started getting his one full meal a day – performance improved …. 90%+ in 10th and eventually working in an MNC…. Sreedhar presented some statistics on reduced drop-out ratio at schools due to Akshay Patra and it was quite touching…. Then came the innovation piece. He just ran thru the videos of how the whole machinery runs like any corporation to feed 1 million + children every day! It was amazing to see rice cooked in tons and curry by barrels in most aseptic conditions. Then he came to the “assembly line” of chapattis – production of 10,000 chapattis per hour on one assembly line - the dough kneaded without touch and then stretched like a piece of cloth in a mill – this sheet is then stamped by round moulds to cut chapattis that go for oven – Rest of the sheet of dough (after circles being cut for chapattis) is recycled again for next round…. As Sreedhar stopped his presentation there was a spontaneous applause from the audience… As Sreedhar started to move away towards his seat Dr Irani interrupted…. “Mr Sreedhar, just a minute .. just one suggestion”.. I strongly felt that after such a wonderful experience even Dr Irani should maintain the silence… but what he said after that was perhaps a glimpse of characteristics that made him Dr Irani the great… “Why don’t you just make square chapattis instead of round – that way the recycling of the dough can be almost completely avoided” … Sreedhar almost froze in his steps and as he smiled at what now looked the most obvious innovative solution…. There was another thunderous applause… even louder than the original!!!

Remembering Appa....

Today Appa would have been 90.... actually I should say today he turns 90 as he lives on in our memory.

I first met Appa when I was 21.... little tentative about how would a grandfather react to grand-daughter’s ‘boyfriend’. What struck me about Aaji (grandmother) and Appa was that they were a peculiar pair of grandparents. Well, they looked like any normal, sweet and loving grandparents but were not actually the archetypical grandparents..... with the twinkle in the eyes they would discuss good novels, films – both English and Hindi and of course music.

Generally when you go to meet the older people, apart from affection, there is also a feeling at the back of your mind to lighten up their day.... in my case I used to visit Appa to lighten up my own day.

As the collage emerges, sweet memories come one after other...

Rarely have I seen such an amazing sense of humor with an exquisite timing..... once in a nationalised bank, an arrogant cashier asked ,”What do you want??” “ 1 Kg potatoes and 1 Kg Onions” pat came the reply. As the fellow was frothing with anger, Appa burst out laughing...... We wanted to run for cover when he asked the fruit vendor “imli kya bhaav diya (whats the price of tamarind?)” because the fellow had given him sour oranges on earlier occasion. Aaji would get extremely worried at these antics but he had a simple theory which made a lot of sense – he would generally calm her down saying “I am an old man and so frail that no-one would ‘dare’ to touch me, at best they would think I am senile which is quite alright!”

I always found it amusing when he used to go to drop my mother-in-law to the bus-stop and check out whether she has got into the bus properly. Aged around 50 and a distinguished educationist in her own right, Appa would treat her exactly like a school-kid. I stopped feeling funny as I waved to my daughter getting into her school bus years later.....

For me, talking to Appa was like watching an old Dev Anand movie like a CID. Apart from being a Dev Anand fan I love that genre of movies as they show a Mumbai of 60’s...... I just love watching the old Mumbai of that era. Appa would walk me down the era much before my birth.... like a grandfather taking a child for a walk. He was an engineer by profession and had a long stint with ACC.....was an outstanding expert in Engineering Design..... we would talk those times... working culture... social life. There was never “good old days compared to today”. While we were discussing job changes he once told me..”I also wanted to change my job once .. but then realised I was working for the best and biggest company of my sector.. where would I go?” – in a life with extremely insecure childhood and lot of struggle he always maintained a very clear-headed approach.

We were gifted to hear the stories from him – he would narrate the old English movies and we would just become kids all over again. One of his most favourite was “The Good Earth” – a movie in 30’s based on Pearl Buck’s novel by the same name. He would tell me about the story, acting, cinematography and virtually everything about the movie. “Lets watch it together if you get it” he would always say. Years passed by, but somehow, I never could lay my hands on that. Once during a long transit period between the flights at JFK, as I was passing time at Madison Square, I walked into a huge bookstore. On a kiosk, I just casually typed “The Good Earth” in the Films section .....and got it .... almost ran to the second floor to pick up the DVD. I hurriedly came back to the Airport to watch it on my laptop. As I started watching it...I realized Appa’s power of narration.....Sitting alone at a far-off place, mist in my eyes blurred the movie.... a thought gnawed my mind.....I knew Appa was on the final stage of his life....we were never going to watch it together....nothing in the world could bring me that moment......As the protagonist (character “lived” by Paul Muni) enters the local entertainment house.....I shut down the laptop..... It is over two years, I have still not watched “The Good Earth” .............may be one of Appa’s Birthdays, I’ll sit together with family and watch it..........

Rs 112/-.....

I can still almost feel and live that morning in 1998. Six months into being an entrepreneur I drove my dad’s Premier Padmini (we all used to call it ‘Fiat’ you know) to the busy market street in Vile Parle and parked it right in front of United Western Bank. I was on my way to market for some sundry work and needed to withdraw Rs 2000/- from my current account on the way. As I waited to pick up my money after handing over the cheque the clerk said – “You don’t have an OD facility but I can give you the money right now” “What do you mean by Overdraft? I just need 2000...whats my balance?” I asked incredulously.”Rs 112/-“ he replied quietly....I just walked back holding the cheque. After studying cash flow and other stuff in MBA, obviously I was stupid with my handling that part. Well... it is not about the cash flow though...I still was fresh from my “salaried” mindset and sense of security and self worth still revolved around the bank account.....

I can still feel that cheque in my hand and the sweat flowing down my face as I sat back in the car feeling low.... what have I done? With a one year old daughter and wife working on her Research, was it really wise to throw away my job and get into something like this? It felt so stupid to be worthy of Rs 112/- .... suddenly also realised the car was also dad’s...actually!

I came home and called Pallavi. When I called up at an odd time of 10.30 in the morning at her Lab she sensed the problem..”What happened?” She asked. “I just went to the bank... we just have Rs 112/-“ .... though I don’t believe in chauvinism, thank god that we were on phone and would have hated her to see my eyes welling up. “So what?” I almost felt stupid at that remark as if it was routine for me to blow up everything and show her an blank bank account.. she continued sweetly ..I guess cautious not to be sympathetic though .. “don’t dramatise the situation... we are not worried about when the next meals will come from and how do we pay for our stay... money will come” . “ Yes but I feel guilty to even go to restaurant and use my credit card”...”So we will not go to one till you feel OK about it..just don’t worry”. Life continued and as I went slogging as usual, money came in ..... one got used the fluctuations also ... no longer money matters were scary .... just kabhie khushi kabhi gum!

Down the line towards the end of the year another incident happened. It was my dear nephew’s thread ceremony (which actually is quite a big function... almost a mini marriage albeit with celibacy J ). As the morning part got over, I just came back to make a few important calls in the afternoon only to realize that my Dubai based customer will not be paying me Rs. 1,00,000/- of my well-deserved consulting fees!!! For a 28 year old middle class boy way back in 1998 – losing a clean 1 lac was quite a news! Well I had to go back for the evening part of the function where the maternal uncle – yours truly – was supposed to be the host! So there I was standing at the function smiling at my guest. Something strange happened – as I was delivering my Oscar-worthy performance... I really started enjoying sometime later.

Apart from financial gains and losses my entrepreneurial stint gifted me with some rare insights into the life. It taught me to size up the risks ..... they are really as small or big as you make them to be.

So whenever I land up in some trouble today... the risk you know... I think of Rs 112/- .... wipe the sweat and move on with a smile!!!!

Spare a Thought for our politicians...

All the News channels were flashing the news of Andhra Pradesh Chief Minister YSR Reddy missing on 2nd September. Not that I know much about YSR’s politics or himself as a politician but as I got up next day, my first reaction was to switch on the News channel hoping for some good news – Unfortunately that was not to be and the tragedy hit everyone a few hours later.

The News channel covered all related stories – about his possible succession and its impact on Andhra politics. There were politicians cutting across party lines paying tribute – while a quiet YSR lying deep in the jungle was being brought back!

There was something disturbing about the whole incident and mind you I am not really talking about Media sensitivity and stuff – I guess they were just carrying on with their jobs!

I was intrigued with my own feelings about the man whom I hardly knew. Why should I be so disturbed – it was definitely not about the accident – those keep happening all the time. No one would ever know what must have crossed his mind dying in a remote place after spending a lifetime in a public glare.

Politicians work almost round the clock at the age when people generally retire, relax and are happy if they are able to take care of their own health and pride (I love the HDFC Standard Life Ads!). I wonder what drives them so hard through-out the life. Do they really have power to live life their own way – indulge in their impulses the way we can. I doubt – I guess it’s a life like a goldfish in a glass bowl – constantly under public glare, constantly meeting the demands of the public image, never setting a foot wrong.

Wouldn’t there be objectives higher than simple greed that keep one away from simple liberties of life:

I’ll be petrified if I am smashed every time I contradict myself – I would be more like a mashed potato than a human body!

I shudder at the thought of being told that my every action must be seen as towards the betterment of someone else!

Even at a workplace I feel the right to have a “Friday Dressing” to break the shackles of formality that tie me down from Monday to Thursday

What if I am told that I cannot change my job for higher salary because that would be very selfish of me!

Professionals with a combination of excellent leadership and management capabilities are jewels in the corporate world – a combination that you will find almost in every successful politician. As you go up the ladder, ability to handle grey areas define the success and here is a job where its only grey that you handle right from the beginning. Most of the stories have started with a cause....on the street.......taking on all that comes along the way – the good, the bad and the ugly.

We have not only lost Andhra Chief Minister but someone has lost a father, a brother, a friend, a husband and most importantly someone has lost a precious life. This is the time when a family may need a private moment to bid farewell to the dear one – a basic privilege that is invariably denied.

Adieu YSR – may your soul rest in PEACE!